A lot of guys think the hard work is trying to get a match on Tinder. After all, you have to wow girls with your profile to ensure they swipe right. It can take ages for you to get your profit right.
In fact, a lot of guys have to spend time editing their profile and making sure their pictures are perfect to finally get that swipe right. But once you have got a successful match, the hard work doesn’t stop. In fact, it’s only just beginning as you now have to strike up a conversation which will then hopefully lead to a date.
A lot of guys find that after the first few messages, the conversation starts to dwindle down and then they are back at the beginning again trying to find a cute girl to connect with. It doesn’t have to be like this though if you make sure that you talk to the girl properly. After all, it’s often poor conversation and bad pick-up lines which put the girl off.
You need to up your chatting game if you want to get someone to meet up with you in real life. But a lot of guys don’t know where to start when it comes to holding a winning conversation on Tinder. Here is how to talk to girls on Tinder, so that you can make a connection IRL sooner rather than later.
Breaking the ice: 5 conversation starters
First things first, it’s all about how you start the conversation. After all, you need to stand out from all the other connections that she’s making on the app. You want your name to be on her mind from now on with all the other competition knocked out the park. If you are stuck for ideas, here are five ways you can begin the conversation.
I have a friend/family member/a FAVORITE singer with your name
Mentioning a girl’s name is a great conversation starter for a number of reasons. For one thing, it shows that you have paid attention to her profile. A lot of girls using the app worry that guys are just swiping for many girls and will give them the same response. Therefore, if you mention her name, it shows you have bothered to look at her profile before starting chatting.
Also, mentioning that you know someone with that name is a great way to give her a quick insight into your life. And it will help her to continue the conversation as she can then ask you more questions about the person. For instance, if you say your friend has that name, she might ask you how you met, and then you can respond with questions about their friends and family too.
Talking about people you know will help you both be more at ease as it’s a conversation you are both comfortable with. You can also mention their name if it’s featured in a song. For instance, if her name is Ruby, you can mention the Kaiser Chiefs song, and then can start chatting about other bands you might both like.
I’ve been to your location before and it’s awesome
Another great way to strike up a conversation with your match is to mention where they come from. After all, there are a wealth of things to talk about when it comes to a location. You can talk about the best bar you have been to, or even where you can get an awesome burger. This can be incredibly useful when it comes to asking them out later.
Also, mentioning their location allows you to ask further questions about how long they have lived there and where they originally come from.
If you have been to the place before, you can also tell them about what you did at the location. This can lead to many cool stories which can help you to get to know each other better. Hopefully, if she’s into you, she might then ask more about your location to ensure you get the conversation flowing.
We have this hobby in common
You will hopefully have read the chick’s bio before swiping right to make a connection. And by doing this, you should have a good idea of what kind of hobbies she might be into. It’s worth getting things started by mentioning one of her hobbies that you both have in common.
Whether it’s a sport or a game you both like, or even something as simple as you both like going for a night out, it can be a great conversation starter. After all, you can then both discuss how long you have been both doing the hobby and what you both like best about it.
Also, mentioning something you both have in common will also show you have taken a look at her profile and are not just clicking on any old girl. She will be pleased you have started with something positive and knowing you both have something in common will get things moving in the right direction.
What’s your biggest achievement?
A run-of-the-mill question is just not going to work when this girl might have 30 other matches on her Tinder. After all, a response of ‘how are you?’ or ‘what are you up to?’ is just going to disappear in the midst of all the other messages.
Therefore, if you want to make an impression on this girl, you need to give her a question she needs to think about. That way, it will stop her in her tracks to make her think about it, and she won’t pass you by.
Asking her something meaningful also shows that you are interested in her and not just wanting a quick fling. She’s bound to be looking for an intelligent guy.
So, if you are asking a question like “what’s your biggest achievement?” it shows that you dream big and want to make a success out of your own life. Once she has answered, it will hopefully lead to you telling her about your own dreams, and you might find that you have a connection in what you both want out of life.
If money was no object, what would your dream dinner be?
Us humans are obsessed with our bellies. And we just love talking about food. Girls especially always have food on the mind. Therefore, you can’t go wrong if you make sure food is part of your first conversation starter. Rather than a simple “what’s your favourite food?” you should go for something a bit more intriguing and thought-provoking.
Asking about their dream dinner will help them start imagining the dish and will make sure they are in a good mood when they respond. Depending on their response, it will open up a whole lot of questions about why they have chosen those dishes and how long they have loved those foods.
You could also go off onto what their ideal fry up or roast dinner might include. Hopefully, they will also ask you what your ideal dinner is and then you can start talking back and forth about grub!
Moving forward: 5 compliments that won’t freak her out
Once you have got the conversation moving and you have learnt a few things about this girl, the next step is to start complimenting her. After all, you haven’t joined Tinder to make a new friend; you are here to find someone to date, so you need to make sure she knows that you liked her from her pictures.
Of course, you don’t want to freak her out. After all, this is where it can all go wrong with the conversation. You say something which makes her feel uncomfortable and she will instantly stop speaking. Therefore, you need to make sure that your compliments hit the right spot. Here are five compliments which are great for impressing that girl on Tinder.
Your outfit looks amazing in that picture
It’s always good to stay away from complimenting their body parts when you are chatting to a girl on Tinder. After all, it’s more likely to cringe them out than turn them on. And then the conversation will end sooner rather than later.
It’s worth complimenting their outfit instead. After all, it’s hinting that you like their figure without coming across too full-on. And it’s likely to make her smile if you say her outfit is hot.
Also, when you compliment their clothes, it’s showing you have a good fashion sense too. And this will be a thumbs-up for a girl as she will hope you will love shopping too.
Hopefully, she will soon return the compliment and then you can up the flirting once she feels more comfortable with you.
You look hot with that hairstyle
Another way you compliment her without being shown the door is to mention her hairstyle. After all, it’s a great way to show her you fancy her without coming across too creepy.
And mentioning their haircut will make them smile. It will show that you have looked at their profile too without just clicking yes to loads of girls. Therefore, tell her that you think her hairstyle looks hot and then you can wait to see whether she returns the compliment.
You can also mention her hair colour instead as another way to show them you’re keen. You might want to say she looks on fire with red hair. Or that her brown locks look great with her skin tone. It might lead to conversations about past hairstyles and you might get lucky and see more pictures of this girl.
You look like Beyoncé/Kim Kardashian/Kylie Jenner
While you don’t want to tell this girl that she looks like another female in your life (mentioning an ex is a definite no-no), you can say they look like a celebrity.
She will love the compliment and if she likes the celeb, even better. Check out her profile and see if she mentions any celebs that she loves. You can’t go wrong with mentioning an on-trend female celeb such as one of the Kardashians as the fact you think she looks like them will raise her confidence.
She might return the favour and say you look like a male celeb too. And then you can get into a flirty conversation. Just make sure that you don’t go on about how fit the celeb woman in question is. Otherwise, it might turn her off and you will find that she ghosts you before long on the app.
Your smile makes your whole face light up
When it comes to complimenting a girl, you can’t really go wrong by mentioning their smile. After all, it’s showing you are keen without coming across too creepy. Girls often worry what guys think about their smile too, so by mentioning it, you’re bound to give her ego a boost.
Also, mentioning how it makes her whole face light up is bound to boost your chances of meeting IRL. After all, it’s showing you have a romantic side. You might want to go an extra step by mentioning that she has the best smile you have seen on the app. While this can be too much for certain girls, it might also help you win her over as girls like a bit of mush sometimes. And it shows that she is a top contender for you which will help things go in the right direction for a date.
Your personality is just as perfect as your looks
It’s not always necessary just to mention their looks when it comes to complimenting the girl. After all, girls want to shine with their personality too.
So, if you want to take steps in the right direction, it’s worth mentioning how amazing their personality is. Tell them how great they are to speak to, and how refreshing it is. You will find that will help them to open up more and it will give them a boost too. After all, they will be worrying about what their messages are like too.
To make sure you stay on a flirty basis though and don’t end up in the friend zone, you do need to tie it in with their looks. Therefore, mentioning how their personality is just as perfect as their looks will help this girl know you are into them.
It will also show them that you think they are the whole package, which is just as important. After all, they will be hoping you are interested in much more than a quick fling with them, so mentioning their personality as well as their looks will help to reassure them you are keen.
Switching to real life: 5 ways to ask her out
After chatting with this great girl and increasing the flirty banter, it will be time to ask her to meet. But for a lot of guys, the thought of asking them to meet in real life leaves them sweating. After all, it can scare a girl off and then she might end the chat.
But at the end of the day, if you don’t ask, the conversation is going to end up always just being online and you will never meet this girl. Therefore, you need to make the move to ask them out when the time is right. Here is how to take the next step and switch to real life.
Is there a place in the area that you have always wanted to go to?
It’s always a good idea to let her decide where to meet. After all, they can then choose somewhere they will be comfortable and feel less intimidated.
Girls like to know where they can make a quick escape route and somewhere they know they can get to easily so the date is less stressful. Therefore, if you want to increase your chances of securing a real-life date, you should ask them where they want to meet.
Asking them where they have always fancied going makes it more fun for them. After all, there might be a restaurant that they have been dying to check out, which puts you in with a good chance before you have even met.
Shall we go see that singer/band perform live?
Hopefully, you have been having conversations with this girl about what bands and singers she likes. After all, music is a great topic to get onto when you are chatting on Tinder.
It can lead to many conversations about who you have seen live over the years and who you are listening to currently on your iTunes.
Music is also a great way to take the next step to a real-life date. Scour the internet for dates when their favourite singer is performing and you can then suggest going to see them live. As it’s someone they are keen about, it will be a great way to encourage them to go on a date.
Even if their favourite singer isn’t performing locally, a band or singer who sing a similar style of music is a great idea for a date. And if music isn’t her thing, you could always go to a play or even a comedy night instead.
Will I be able to have your digits?
If you have been talking to this girl for a while on Tinder, it makes sense to ask them for their number. After all, it’s taking the next step to get on a more personal level with this girl.
Once you have their digits, you can then text and message them more regularly. And you could even ask to speak to this girl on the phone.
It might put her at ease if you have a phone conversation before meeting up in real life. And asking for her number is a sure sign that you are hoping things will progress to a date. So, she can then cool it off or go ahead and swap numbers with a date then being in the pipeline.
Are you going out to the bar/club on Friday night?
You will want to make sure you don’t scare a girl off when asking for a date. After all, the thought of the two of you together alone might leave her in a panic. Therefore, one way you can meet her in real life and get to know each other is to arrange to see her when she’s out already.
For instance, if she’s heading to a pub or club in the local area with her mates, you can say you’re going as well. And then you can both meet each other without too much pressure. After all, once you have had a chat and hopefully arranged a proper date, you can both go back to your nights out with your friends.
Therefore, find out where she is heading at the weekend and then make arrangements so that the two of you can finally meet.
I would love to get to know you away from a screen
It doesn’t have to be difficult to take the next step of dating in real life. You just need to be honest that you would like to see this girl in real life.
Explain that you think that you would have a real connection if you met up and would love to see if sparks would fly. She will appreciate your honesty and it will probably go down well that you aren’t just one for talking online all the time.
Hopefully, she will also want to get to know you without having to just talk through the app and she will take a leap of faith by going out on a date with you.
So, there you have it. If you begin the conversation well, make sure you increase the flirty banter and then arrange to meet, you will soon be a pro at talking to girls on Tinder.