The Desire System makes the following bold proclamation: “It sounds like science fiction, but when you transcend your fear and tap into the raw, ravening power of the Emotional Activation System, you’ll make women feel anything you want them to feel.”. Presented as a series of training videos presented by…, the Desire System offers advice on how the so-called ‘Desire System’ actually works.
Topics range from ‘The Science of Attraction’ to ‘The Approach’ and ‘Connection’ – all in the quest to get that babe that you really want. Presented by David Tian as part of the ‘Social Man’ training series, the real question is whether or not The Desire System offers anything new or refreshing – or even if it offers anything that is remotely a ‘system’ that is unified and has a certain logic. Those questions will be explored in this review of The Desire System.
Language Of Lust
Our Rating: D+
Creator: David Tian
The Desire System is presented in as scientific an approach as possible, whilst still being presented in a format and tone that feels very familiar and similar to other dating training courses. David Tian does his best to present the research that defines the ‘System’ by a series of filmed training sessions. Affable enough, Tian goes through the various concepts and principles as best as he can with his class of young guys.
Unfortunately, it’s boring. There has clearly been quite a lot of work and effort put into The Desire System itself but it comes across stale and not very engaging. And it’s not because it’s too ‘intellectual’ or ‘academic’ – not at all. The content is interesting at times but not revolutionary and Tian is an okay presenter but has zero charisma, which makes for a dull affair. And there is zero engagement with the guys in the class – much like one’s engagement with this well-intended but tedious course.
The course is offered with a series of ten training videos, which seem to take part in some training venue in the hills overlooking Los Angeles. David Tian is the facilitator-presenter here and he presents his course in front of a motley crew of mostly young-looking guys in attendance. It’s clear that guys are as desperate to get to know how to score with the ladies in the City of Angels as anywhere else on the planet.
Christian Hudson does the initial introduction, in a manner which seems almost apologetic. There’s something strangely unassertive and stilted about him, unlike his own work in The Social Man series. At least David Tian (or, rather, Doctor David Tian), once he has been introduced and takes over, seems more confident and affable. Tian puts it out there immediately by stating that, “The goal of this training is to have a great sex life”. So, nothing too difficult there, of course…
Tian makes adamantly claims that there is science behind the training to be offered. The embodiment of this training is what is referred to as the “Rake”. There is the “Ardent Rake” which informs us that an intense desire that a guy has a for a woman has a hugely ‘distracting power’ on the woman. Then there is the “Advanced Rake,” the most important aspect of which is to show no hesitation, to abandon all restraint, to let yourself go and to show that you cannot control yourself – whoah!
Tian tells us that you must start with what is known as ‘Emotional Activation’. They key is to make her feel that you have feelings and care about here and not merely to show or tell her. For her, it’s all about the emotion – and we all know how damn difficult that can be to pull off for most guys! By the way, Tian does the odd role-play along the way with a rather fetching lady – unfortunately, the scenarios mostly seem forced and the dialogue mostly rubbish.
Tian is rather insistent that it’s not the words that matter, but the emotion. The way a guy should do this is by ‘amplifying’ the feeling of great emotion that he once had. It’s an interesting concept but not much in the way of concrete insight is provided.
There is a science to attraction and therefore, by analogy with the theory in this course, a science to emotion. Tian conveys how over 90% of attraction comes from rapid, unconscious cognitive events, e.g. those split-second judgments that go on in our brain, especially the first time we meet someone we’re attracted to. Being a scholar, Tian introduces concepts like ‘micro expressions’ and the ’emotional feedback loop’.
And it goes on (and on) with topics like humor and vulnerability (essential!), neediness (a typical no-no!) and that all-elusive little number, self-esteem (always needed, of course!). It’s one set of concepts and principles after another that never seem to have a definitive destination or, for that matter, purpose. By the last few chapters, this reviewer for one was really not interested to know what happens next.
A 71-page PDF of the actual course by David Tian hardly qualifies as a reak ‘extra,’ but it sure did come in handy to back up the key points that were being flogged ad nauseam in the various video clips. The only other extra for The Desire System course is a Forum section, which is actually for users of all the various courses available under what is The Social Man banner. There are an impressive number of threads and some really good discussions between users on the go – at least that.
And how does it look and feel?
The landing page of The Social Man is quite polished-looking, although the actual page for The Desire System is as blah as the course itself. The videos of the training session that David Tian conducts are the main focus for the course, so it’s worth noting that the camera work was generally very good and professional, if rather static in the classroom setting. Basically, the camera hardly ever moves and that just exacerbates the overall dryness of the course.
What’s To Like About The Modern Relationship course?
- Even if a course doesn’t work or doesn’t gel, which is very much the case with The Desire System, I nevertheless always appreciate hard work and a lot of thinking behind a training product. David Tian obviously believes in what he espouses, and it shows in the level of background and (to an extent) empirical research that he offers during the training. This is not some throwaway, lazy effort, and that is appreciated.
- Some of the principles on offer here have merit and at least Tian sticks to them. For example, there is a definite belief in emotion being the most important part of attraction. Although not comprehensively or convincingly backed up with real life evidence, there was an attempt at research-based argument to back up the concept. There is a certain trajectory to the learning here, even if it does meander and slow down to a crawl for the most part.
What’s Not To Like About The Modern Relationship course?
- I’m sorry to seem glib, but the content on offer simply isn’t ‘revolutionary’ or different enough to be attention-grabbing.There is so much competition out there in dating training courses, that I am consistently taken aback at how many of these courses continue to present content that feels so familiar and adds nothing exceptional to the body of learning when it comes to dating.
- The Desire System is the personification of a course that is simply too dull and plodding for its own good. Too much of the content is presented in a manner akin to being in a class in college that should be really interesting but which just drones on and on to the point where terminal boredom sets in. It was actually quite telling how bored most of the guys in the classed looked. This was clearly a full one-day workshop and it was quite hilarious to see the faces of the guys as day (slowly) turned to night in L.A. – by the latter videos, you could see most of the guys couldn’t wait to get the fuck out of there!
- David Tian seems like a nice and intelligent enough guy, but a great communicator he is not. His demeanour was confident enough, but he had zero empathy with his group of guys. I mean, how the hell can you have all that training and literally have no verbal interaction with the guys in the class, never mind set them tasks or get them talking between themselves. Jeepers, these guys need to learn a thing or two about adult-based experiential learning! And bringing in that strutting macho cockerel known as Jason Capital as a guest speaker didn’t help things a single bit. Will no one tell this guy that he is not as cool and ‘switched on hip’ as he thinks he is?!
Language Of Lust
Our Rating: D+
Creator: David Tian
It’s always a pity when a training course that clearly took a lot of thought and effort doesn’t work. The Desire System has some integrity in its purpose and at least it’s not a total waste of time unlike some other courses previously reviewed on here. Unfortunately, this course is just too much of a slog presented in the dull way that it is by a trainer that may be good at his research but does not have the charisma to pull it off.
The biggest fault in this presentation is that David Tian had no interaction whatsoever with a bunch of guys who were surely keen to be there and had paid good money to do so. Yet what they got was a course that seemed to drag on forever, with the once bright sunlight of Los Angeles fading to deep night in the background. The lethargy in the proceedings was palpable. Neither the content nor the delivery could make this a memorable or great course. The Desire System is clearly a decent opportunity lost.