Why Do People Date: More Than a Social Norm

Wondering why do people date? People have been going on dates since time immemorial. When we hear the phrase “going out on a date,” we think of it as a formal social engagement between two people (or more, if it is a group date), which marks the beginning of their romantic relationship.

However, each culture has their own set of rules and standards when it comes to dating. Some date for a very long time with no marriage in mind while some skip this phase and head on straight to marriage, which makes everything rather confusing.

Why Do People Date?

There are many perspectives on dating. Some don’t see any reason why they need to date while some see it as a necessary phase to go through. Below are the most common reasons why do people date.

  • To get to know each other

A romantic relationship between two strangers usually starts with physical attraction. Let’s say that you’re a guy who happened to meet a girl of your type at some random time or a mutual friend introduces her to you. What do you do to get to know more about her? Obviously, you ask her out on a date.

Getting to know someone is the number one reason why people go on dates. They do fun activities together and, during or after the experience, they may feel more connected with each other. In this period, the couple also decides if they want to take their relationship to a deeper level of intimacy.

  • To test their compatibility

Even after knowing each other for some time, some couples continue to go on dates to test their compatibility further. They want to know first if their personalities really complement before committing to an official romantic relationship.

This can also be the case for friends who have developed feelings for each other. They may decide to go on dates first to find out if their relationship as a romantic couple has a high chance of being successful, or if it is better to remain friends only.

  • To find “The One”

Not all dates are set up between people who are already acquainted with each other. There are these so-called blind dates wherein, someone, usually a mutual acquaintance, arranges a date for two people who will meet for the first time.

This is an exciting way to meet people if you are a busy person and don’t have time to socialize and be “out there” to find a partner. This is also the reason why some people go on dates endlessly. They try to meet new people date after date until they find the one whom they want to have a serious, long-term relationship with.

  • To have some fun

While most people take dating seriously, there are also some who go on dates just to kill time and boredom—no strings attached! They find someone with the same outlook as they have, then hang out with them for a short time just to have fun together.

There are also some people who ask someone out on a date because they are required to bring a date on a social event that they are attending. It could just be a one-time event, but if they had fun together, then they could continue seeing each other.

  • To rekindle a long-term relationship

Who said that dating is just for new couples? Even couples who have been together for a long time or have been long married still go on dates to maintain a happy relationship.

To keep the fire burning in a relationship, couples must continually get to know each other and experience new fun things together. It is important to have alone time together outside the bedroom. Many happily married couples attest that spending time together doing non-chore things is what keeps their relationship strong and fulfilled.

  • To make someone jealous

Unfortunately, there are also people whose intentions are not pure and asks someone out on a date or agrees to be on a date just to make the person whom he or she truly likes jealous. These people view dating as a tactic or a strategy to get the person they like. They date someone on purpose to show that they are, indeed, a girlfriend or boyfriend material. They show the person they like what he or she is missing out on by not going out with them.

Some girls also use this tactic if they know that a guy likes her but is too shy to ask her out on a date. These girls know that guys get triggered or challenged once they see the girl whom they like out on a date with someone other than them. It makes them take action.

  • To hide their true identity

This is a sad reason, but one that is actually happening in real life. Most people date to hide their true identity. While the pro-LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender) propaganda is gaining worldwide recognition, there are still people who refuse to acknowledge and accept the LGBT community, especially those living in a conservative country.

This leads gays, for example, to hide their gayness by dating girls. They don’t want to raise suspicions to avoid being the talk of the town.

This is also true for people with mental illnesses such as depression. They date because they want to show people that they are leading happy, normal lives. In fact, even normal, average people date just for the sake of it! Even though they are not ready, they are pressured to date because that is what people their age is expected to do.

Final Thoughts

Going on a date is supposed to be a positive experience for two people. The main reason why people date is because it is the traditional (or universal) way of getting to know one another under a formal, pleasant setting. By going on dates, people also get to have some fun and experience things together, which lead to a deeper connection with one another.

However, there are also some negative reasons why people date. They may do this to seek revenge, make someone jealous, or hide their gender preferences. It is a toxic way to cope with personal issues. Plus, doing so will also hurt the other person because the intention is not good in the first place.

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